we can live forever if you've got the time *

[rander k. bedeau]

s h o u l d i g i v e u p o r s h o u l d i

just keep chasing pavements even though it

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style,background-image: url('http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g79/Juliart/background_black.jpg');,true][cs=2] L E A D S T O N O W H E R E

[atrb=width,240] rander never thought that by this point in his life, he would be happy. he was just twenty-three years old, and already, it felt like nothing could ever be better. he had it all. he had a beautiful fiancé, whom he loved and intended to marry soon. and on top of it, he already had his dream job. how many struggling journalists could say they would reach editor status by the young age of twenty-three? rander had always been lucky with how everything played out in his life, and this promotion could easily be stated as the epitome of it all. he had everything, at just twenty-three years of age, that he wanted. there was nothing else, rander thought, that would be able to make him any happier. well, except maybe to get rid of the fear of what his family would do when they found out his fiancé wasn’t a pureblood. rander, coming from a pureblood elitist family, had grown up with the mentality that he was better than others because of his blood status. he went to a very prestigious wizarding academy in france, where he grew up, and when he attended the university of hogwarts in england, he was placed into slytherin almost instantly. however, it was also while he was in england for his four years in college that he realized he didn’t really care about any of that. he wasn’t concerned with blood status. it always did sort of annoy him how, when he was younger, his parents would always try to sneak into a conversation that they were pureblood and therefore, better than you. even when he was young, rander never tried that, but now he realized even more that it wasn’t too much of a concern with him. his only concern was how his parents would react when they discovered their secret. it hadn’t seemed anything of big concern at the time, when they were dating, and not even when rander proposed to her. all he, and aca too, he had assumed, was thinking about was how he loved her and how even though others would think they rushed this, even though they hadn’t really been dating that long, they would be together forever. paris was the city of love; it had that effect on you. rander really did wonder, once in a while, if that had had anything to do with it — the atmosphere. that maybe acanthus had been more willing to say yes because of where they were, because it was more of a spur of the moment thing than anything. well hell, rander knew that it was a spur of the moment thing no matter what. however, he knew that he at least, for a fact, was happy with his decision. he really did love aca. he didn’t plan on leaving her; he wanted to marry her, and settle down with her, maybe have a few children. they would be happy. they all would be. rander had a plan for his life and he didn’t plan on letting any of it change. in fact, it was a very well-thought out plan, specifics included and all. when they were married, they were going to stay in england. he wasn’t going to go back home to france. they would visit every summer, and eventually, they would buy a vacation home of sorts out there, their main home in england. eventually they would have a vacation home in italy, too. rander’s life plans didn’t include a whole lot about his career, because he was already happy where he was. in fact, he was ecstatic with it. he didn’t believe that it could be any better. honestly, editor of transfiguration today? it was his dream, and he didn’t plan on any of that changing. well, rander didn’t plan about anything in his life changing. he had it planned out, with just the perfect amount of fun time allotted for current day. like tonight. aca was working, and he’d finished up in the office by six. it was eight now, and he figured he deserved a little break. rander may have loved his job, but even when you have the best job in the world, you deserve a break now and again. tonight’s break had come in the form of a nip down to nitro for a drink. or two. or a few more than that, really, but who cared? it was friday night, and for once, rander didn’t have to go into the office tomorrow. and so he was going to celebrate. he’d probably end up celebrating a bit too long, but rander also knew how to hold his liquor. he wasn’t too concerned about getting into any trouble tonight. it paid to know how to drink. “another firewhiskey, on the rocks,” he asked the bartender, tossing a sickle onto the bar carelessly. it was always the smallest change rander walked around with. not only did it pay to know how to drink, but it paid to be rich. even if he hadn’t gotten so lucky with his career, he would have been set anyway, having the parents that he did. however, rander also would have felt guilty about using his parents’ money after probably a week. he was a very independent person; he hated relying on them when he was younger, and he would hate it even more now, without a doubt. the only person he didn’t mind relying on was acanthus, and that was in a different sense of reliance. he relied on her to have someone to love, to have someone who made him happy. he didn’t need anything else, right? well, except maybe a place to sit. rander grabbed his glass, leaving the change on the counter, and turned around, only to run straight into someone and spill his drink all over the two of them. “oh, shit!” he muttered, irritated both at his clumsiness and also because he no longer had a firewhiskey. “jeez, i’m sorry,” he said quickly, running a hand through his hair. he pulled his wand out of his pocket and quickly cleaned up the mess. “you’re okay, right?” it was then that rander finally took a look at who he was talking to. it was a girl. a.. a young girl. not really young, but at least a few years younger than him. and she was pretty. even engaged, rander wouldn’t have been able to not notice that.

[atrb=width,100] words , one thousand seventy-three of them tagged , stephanie with lulu! <3 muse , walls by the rocket summer notes , this didn’t take me ages…

TEMPLATE BY THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE MIKEY @ CAUTION 2.0

[leslie l. stretton]

sure she's got it all
BUT BABY IS THAT REALLY WHAT YOU WANT?

it was one thing to let near death experience change you. lulu stretton had taken it to a whole different level. what happened only a few weeks ago hadn't really done much for her. there was a while where she tried to be sober. classes were attended, parties were avoiding, and she shut herself in. granted, that was mostly to hide from the brother who had suddenly reappeared in her life after years of absence. his showing up at her bedside like he cared wasn't really on her agenda of handled emotions. in fact, she had done all the opposite of what she should have done, which was let him in and help her. what she found herself rather proud of was that instead of going on and continuing her masquerade of booze and potions and experimentation, lulu had locked herself away in her dormitory and poured herself into studying. it was a little shocking to realize just how far down her grades had dropped. there hadn't been too far enough gone, but extra effort was needed. almost two weeks later, she was in a bit of better standing. however, that did little to help other matters.

she could pour herself into her studies all she wanted, hidden away in her dorm all she wanted. there was no avoiding the feelings she felt inside. her masked happiness had worn thin, part of the reason she has drawn away from everyone. it was all far too complicated for her to bother sharing with another individual. if she couldn't handle the raging depression herself, how could anyone else? for a few days, things had been okay. then, the downward spiral started. if studies couldn't distract her and her option to avoid drinking were being held at upmost importance, there was only one last thing. this is where she found herself cutting more, desperate to feel something other than the numbness caused her and desperate to escape from the overwhelming feeling. it was something she couldn't explain to anyone else, so she kept it bottled inside. and the bottle had finally broken, released in the form of deep cuts that lined her upper thighs. eventually though, that too was not enough.

there had to be change. drastic change and at first, she wasn't sure where it would come from. then, something hit her. perhaps physical change was what she needed. with the help of a fancy little fund her parents had given her as to afford food and other essentials, lulu set off in her day with an agenda. by the end of the day and beginning of the night, the newly brunette stretton girl stood in front of her mirror in a brand new pink leopard print tube dress with pink pumps to match. it was rather feminine, but a nice look with her new hair. smiling at the person in the mirror she hardly recognized, lulu took it upon herself to reward herself for the good work done that day and the past few weeks. what better way to reward herself than with a night out? however, she would steer clear of parties and potions and go straight to the bar. it was less likely she would see any of her 'friends' there since all she wanted was a good drink. but that's how it always starts, just one drink.

going out to nitro was a little bit different than her usual agenda for a night of drinking. actually, she had never been out to the popular nightclub although she had heard a lot about it. having one martini at the bar turned into a man buying her a shot and bringing her to the dance floor. after kindly declined his offer to accompany him home, she returned to the bar only to have the same thing happen again. who was she to object to free drinks? several bought drinks later and a few declined offers for a night of rendezvous in stranger mens' apartments, lulu was well on her way to feeling nothing. it was like nothing has changed. turning away from an irritable looking gentleman, lulu walked off with a bit of a pounce in her step, giddy with the closest thing to joy and happiness she might ever come to. a stumble was apparent in her walk here or there, but nothing she didn't play off as she made her way to the bar. just as she approached the bar however, lost in her own world, lulu found herself colliding with another person and being doused in the person's drink. "knull," she cried out, stumbling back slightly in the high heels she definitely wasn't used to wearing. her intoxication level didn't help anyone. "skämtar du med mig?" she continued to mutter to herself in swedish. when drinking, it was known for her to slip in between english and swedish since both are native to her tongue. swedish is just rarely used though. technically, their family was originally from england anyway. but it was only then that the liquid disappeared from her dress and lulu looked up to see who she has collided with.

a smile instantly popped onto her face, taking in the gorgeous man in front of her. it may have been all the booze, but she had a sudden surge of confidence flow through her. perhaps it was the new look. lulu brushed of hair from her face and nodded. "quite alright, now that you cleaned my dress. i'm terribly sorry i wasn't looking where i was going. may i buy you another drink?" she knew that she looked young, seeing that in fact she was compared to the man who looked to have at least four years on her, but that didn't stop her trying to putt on a look that said both innocent and sultry at the same time. god only knew if it was working. flirting had never been a forte of her's. before she knew it, she has motioned for him to follow her as she made her way to an empty section at the bar. once he had joined her, she waved a hand to the bartender. "i'll have an apple martini, dirty. and whatever this gentleman was drinking," she beckoned before looked back at him. her hand extended out towards him. "lulu stretton, pleasure meeting you." there was something about him, she thought, as she took in all of his flawless feature. maybe it was the alcohol talking, but for once, lulu found herself wanting to do more than have a drink and dance with this guy. and who was anyone to stop her?

tagged: rander bedeau - - word count: 1105 - - lyric credit: rumor has it - adele - - graphic/template credit: myself - - notes: SOSOSOSO sorry for the wait!