revealing drunken secrets* (autumn)

[gabriel]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; background-image: url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/oceanbreezebg.png); padding-bottom: 20px;] words // 489 (sorry) // tagged // autumn <3 boy with a coin, T H E N M A K I N G A W I S H , A N D T O S S E D I N T H E S E A gabriel was drunk. there was no going round it. the boy was staggering from side to side as he attempted to make it back safely to his dorm, every so often having to change direction to stop himself from walking into a streetlamp or bush. he hadn’t meant to get this drunk. it had just happened. in fact, it was a little sad really because it wasn’t like he had been at some amazing party with lots of friends, having the time of his life. no it was quite the opposite. he had been drowning his sorrows, on his own in some random bar, drinking beer after beer. this had definitely not been a good day. him and jasleen had had another big argument. he was just as much to blame for it as she was but he didn’t know how to tell her just how much he liked her. from the moment the sorting hat had put her in slytherin way back at Hogwarts he had always had a crush on her. she was just so beautiful and every time gabriel set eyes on her he could feel his heartbeat quickening. she didn’t feel the same about him though. all they ever did was argue and call each other names. gabriel knew he was stupid for retaliating with just as bad insults and he got but at least he was talking to her. he really didn’t know how else to express his feelings for her. despite the fact that jasleen had absolutely no feelings for him and made that fact obvious gabriel couldn’t help but feel guilty when he was with other girls. when he gets drunk gabriel is quite flirty and normally makes out with more then one girl but the next morning he always feels guilty about it and when he sees jasleen he feels like he’s cheated on them. he hated it so much and it got on his nerves. that’s why he had never been truly intimate with a girl. yes gabriel may come across as a bit of a bad boy ladies man so you’d expect him to be sleeping with a different girl each night but gabriel was in fact a virgin but he was the only one who knew that. it may ruin his reputation if anyone found that out. he wanted to wait for that special girl though. he wanted his first time to be meaningful, not just on some random girl he didn’t know the name of. if he was truthful with himself he wanted his first time to be with jasleen. kicking a rock hard he swore as pain shot up his foot. this night was just getting worse and worse. he trailed along, seeming to find it more and more difficult to walk as time went on, he quickly rounded a corner and found himself walking straight into someone. “for fucks sake watch where your going!” notes // ahhh rubbish first post! sorry sorry sorry! notes

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN OF CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY IRON & WINE[/center]

[autumn s. blake]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #982D44; border-bottom:30px solid #982D44; border-top:30px solid #982D44; border-right: 30px solid #982D44;] oh merlin, ever since aus and embry broke up, she had been getting moodier and moodier. it was irritating to know that the one person you wanted didn’t seem to want to do anything with you. was it because she found out his secret? or maybe he really did move on. she wasn’t quite girlfriend material. she knew this, he knew this. you could ask the whole damn school and they’d all say the same. it was a fact she was ashamed of, but she didn’t quite flaunt it off like everything else. she did have the tendency to hide her troubles. if it was bothering her too much, she didn’t say it out loud. but if it was smaller, she might as well blurt it to the whole world, i mean, really. but her relationship with embry was something... it was special. and when you’re only twenty years old, saying that is incredibly important. it was the longest relationship she had ever been in and even at three years, she still wanted to be with him. it sounded sick and disgusting and gross. she knew that quite well. she used to make fun of people who were just like that. she would taunt and mock their behaviors, making kissy faces at them and pretending to be one of those happily ever after couples. the thing was a laugh and like everything else in life, it happened when she wasn’t expecting it. that christmas morning had been the best one yet and each day with him just got better and better. until that breakup. she just wished it hadn’t ended so quickly. she missed the way he touched her, the way he whispered her name, everything. the little things she ignored suddenly made their relationship so sweet and different from everyone else’s. she didn’t care whether it was a secret relationship. they both had reputations to keep up and making it secret made it theirs. it made their lives easier from people nagging them constantly or warning them against each other. it was better that way. aus couldn’t remember the last time she felt so numb- oh wait. it was when she was in her fifth year and they went sledding on every hill until she couldn’t feel a single part in her body. but this was a different sort of numbness. she woke up every morning wishing that it was gone, but it wasn’t. every ache was still there, every word he spoke still followed her around. it was unavoidable. that’s why she went out with her friends. she wanted to forget about the whole thing for maybe just one night. she couldn’t remember the last time she was so dependent on someone else. her friends were just trying to help her. they knew she was upset, they didn’t know what it was about, but she let them think it was about whatever they thought it was. she didn’t care for rumors. they were usually fake anyways. aus glanced back at her watch, her body swaying from left to right, left to right. “guys, immagobacktomyroom,” she muttered, managing to get up and staggering slightly to the door. someone got up to help guide her, but she pushed them away. she didn’t need their damn help no matter how nice they were trying to be. she drank a little more firewhiskey than she intended, but at least she hadn’t thought about embry and- dammit. she took one more swig from the bottle and shook her head. no, that wasn’t going to happen. she was doing just fine -no, not really- until recent events. that meeting with him and then the mention of dating from that other snakeboy. he was an idiot, he really was. what was his name again though? she bit her lip, letting the pain be the only thing on her mind. that was until she felt herself collide into someone else, knocking her to the ground. if only she had a bit more balance right now, she would have pushed them back. she glared back at the boy before she smirked, seeing who it was. “well look who it is, mister ugly himself! in person! and how did i get this pleasure of bumping into you?” she sneered, her eyes slightly unfocused. dammit. she shouldn’t have drank so much. look where it got her. she was bumping into nightmares and more nightmares by the minute. notes, tadaa! word count, 744 thanks brooklyn from caution

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[gabriel]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; background-image: url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/oceanbreezebg.png); padding-bottom: 20px;] words // 747 // tagged // autumn <3 boy with a coin, T H E N M A K I N G A W I S H , A N D T O S S E D I N T H E S E A as gabriel realised who he had bumped in to his heart sank and anger rose up slowly within him. that was the last person he would have wanted to see at this point in time. him and autumn were definitely two people that really didn’t get on with each other and they definitely didn’t try to hide that fact from each other. then again why would they ever think that they would get along? firstly autumn was a gryffindor and gabriel was a slytherin. those two houses were known for hating each other and with these two it was definitely not an exception. then there was the fact that autumn was a mudblood. there had been a time where gabriel was absolutely fine with mudbloods, in fact his first best friend was a mudblood but his father had quickly beaten it out of him. for you see gabriel’s father was definitely a typical slytherin. gabriel dread to think what his father did at work but he knew it wasn’t going to be something good. part of gabriel wondered why you would hate someone just because their parents were muggles but his more arrogant, vaisley side always shun through in situations such as these. but it wasn’t just autumns background as to why gabriel didn’t like her. it was also her general personality. she was rude to gabriel and treated him like dirt. gabriel hated the way that she made him seem so stupid and worthless. it really drove him insane. normally he could contain it but he seemed to be spending a lot more time with her recently, well ever since one of his professors paired him with her for an assignment. he was beginning to wonder whether he should just give up on it and take the fail. at least then she would fail too. however gabriel could only fear what his father might do to him if he failed something. although gabriel was a bit too old for a beating, god knows what gabriel’s father could do with his wand. gabriel shivered slightly at the thought of his father before peering down to look at autumn, slightly satisfied that he had knocked her to the ground but even more impressed that he had managed to keep himself upright in his drunken state. gabriel frowned slightly at her comment, staring down at her coldly. “i’m not the one on the floor, hair looking like they’d been pulled through a hedge backwards, ripped tights and looking like a complete and utter state now am i?” he said superiorly, a small smirk on his lips, despite the fact that even he noticed that his voice was slurred and that he was definitely swaying from side to side. he needed to get to bed and sleep this off. he groaned slightly at the thought of the hangover he was going to have the next morning but shook his head, a little two violently and found himself off balance and fell in a heap right next to autumn. “fuck.” he muttered loudly as he tried to sit himself up. “I have definitely had too much to drink.” he pointed out before rubbing his head, trying to focus. this day was turning out to be the worst day ever and as he sat, the hard ground cold beneath himself he started to feel tears welling in his eyes. now gabriel was never one to cry but when he got drunk he was always very emotional. normally he would be very giggly and silly, other times he would get angry and start a fight but when he had had a bad day he normally ended up getting very depressed. “no wonder she doesn’t fucking love me. i’m a mess. she would want a good looking, strong person who’s got loads of experience, not a pathetic little virgin like me!” he splurted out, forgetting in his drunken state that the person he was telling all of his secrets to was one of his enemies. he was too drunk and upset to care now though. his mind was fuzzy with alcohol and anger and hurt. he just wanted someone to talk to. someone to tell him that everything was going to be alright. as gabriel buried his head in his hands, he felt tears flowing down his cheeks and was just begging that autumn was going to be sympathetic in a situation like this and not just laugh in his face. notes // please please please be friendly to my poor drunken, emotional baby xD <3

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN OF CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY IRON & WINE[/center]

[autumn s. blake]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #982D44; border-bottom:30px solid #982D44; border-top:30px solid #982D44; border-right: 30px solid #982D44;] the time was getting later and later and speaking with vaisley was the last thing she wanted. the poor kid could barely tell the difference between left and right and it was miserable. her views of him varied from disgust to annoyance. nothing really screamed at her that he was a superstar though. he didn’t seem all that great. and sober aus could have ranted on about him. he was a snake for one thing. she had the biggest biased opinion on them. they were almost all the same. they betrayed people. they were annoying. they were rude. they were stupid. they were disgusting and all this time, they were incredibly good looking. it all didn’t work out and so in the world, you ended up having a ton of good looking idiots. it was a strange combination. there were only a few people that proved that theory wrong, but hey! there was always an exception to the rule, right? so anyways, with vaisley, the only thing she liked was pushing his buttons. he was such an easy target that it was laughable to see how worked up he could get. she enjoyed that feeling very much. too bad she was insulting him at the time of the pairing up. her professor saw the two talking and decided to have fun with the whole project and set them to be partners. so far, they hadn’t gotten anything done. aus drew a picture of a hippogriff, but with her drawing skills, it might as well be a circle with sticks poking out of it. she didn’t dare show it to vaisley. she knew her drawing sucked and she didn’t need him making fun of her. she was smarter than that. duh. she got up- a bit difficult, mind you, and brushed herself off, “please.. it’s better than you’ll ever look.” aus rubbed the back of her neck, figuring out what the best way to leave. she wanted to hit him, but she knew if she did, she probably would want to finish off the job with some real good ass kicking as well. maybe this is where her balance would have come in handy. dammit. she really had to do some planning in the future when she went out to drink or something. she couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at his confession. she would have said something more but then the tears started and she couldn’t do anything about it. usually she was the one who was making people cry and if this wasn’t the case, she felt a bit guilty. this wasn’t fair. not one bit, dammit. aus stopped with the insults and glanced his way. she rubbed her eyes a little and then tried to be a little more sympathetic. she wasn’t heartless and although she did hate his guts, she did have a bit of a protective streak with people she interacted with. if gabe was in a herd of angry unicorns and they would kill him, she would like nothing more but to let them, but even she knew that wouldn’t happen. she would save him at the last minute... and then have him pay for it later on. aus found herself sitting next to him, not too close but close enough to hear his mutters and sob story. her vision was a bit blurrier than she would have liked. the sober aus wanted to see his miserable look but the drunk one just wanted him to quit crying. it was making her heart beat once again and she had worked oh so hard to make it stop beating like that. “uh,” she started and paused. she wasn’t good at comforting people. why did merlin leave her up to this job anyways? aus turned away and took another loud gulp of the firewhiskey, “want some? might... dull the pain a bit.” she handed him the flask which was set to automatically set up with more once it ran out. the handy things that wizards thought up of. “if it helps and you probably won’t... believe it but my... my life isn’t going so great either. i mean with the break up, the whole thing just went... down the toilet, dammit,” she muttered, her words mixing in together. she didn’t even know what she was saying anymore. it was all a bit on the unconscious state of mind and really, this was just her heart saying things that she really did mean. if only it was with someone she really cared about, that might have been a benefit as well. notes, LOL. sympathy and aus do not go together word count, 763 thanks brooklyn from caution

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[gabriel]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; background-image: url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/oceanbreezebg.png); padding-bottom: 20px;] words // 606 // tagged // autumn <3 boy with a coin, T H E N M A K I N G A W I S H , A N D T O S S E D I N T H E S E A gabriel couldn’t quite believe that he was crying but then again at the same time he really couldn’t stop. everything had just got on top of him lately and now he had to just let it all out and have a good cry. he didn’t even care that autumn was watching him. not only was he too drunk to care but he probably wouldn’t even remember this the next day and from the looks of autumn neither would she. then again even if she did gabriel would just boast how drunk he had been and everyone would understand. he had seen lots of his friends crying when they had got really drunk. it was the only time it was acceptable for a boy to cry. that and when the got kicked in their private areas. those were the two exceptions. gabriel felt autumn sitting next to him and sniffed loudly, trying to calm himself down. the more he thought about it the more depressed he felt. a nineteen year old virgin. how pathetic was that? he was the most pathetic person he knew. everyone he knew had lost his virginity. gabriel lifted his head slightly to look at the firewhiskey that was being offered to him and took it, lifting it to his lips. as soon as he realised it was a replenishing one he gulped down as much as he could take and automatically felt a lot better. however he was now beyond drunk and his mind was fuzzy with alcohol. had he had any sensible part of his mind left he would wonder how the hell he was going to make his way back to the dorm but he was now so drunk he had gone beyond the state of caring. he looked at autumn and smiled slightly, handing back the flask. “thank you so much. you know what. you are the nicest person ever!” he exclaimed, his voice slurred as he swayed slightly from side to side. there was no way he would have said anything like that to autumn blake when he was sober. no way on this earth. as autumn explained about her recent break up gabriel nodded sympathetically, listening carefully before opening his mouth to speak. “you’ll find someone else. unlike me!” he said, tears threatening to reappear again as his mind wandered back to his life’s problems. he shook his head violently, determined not to get upset again. as he looked at autumn he suddenly found himself leaning forward to kiss her, his lips reaching his own, his body completely taken over by alcohol. he had no idea why he was doing it, it just felt right. well here gabriel was having girl problems and autumn was having guy troubles so why not kill two birds with one stone. of course, had he been sober he probably would have made some snide comment about her losing her boyfriend but no. all he wanted to do in his drunken state was kiss her. this is what he did when gabriel got drunk. kissed girls. it kind of dulled the pain but never in his life had he kissed one of his enemies. then again never in his life had he been this drunk and overly emotional. as he pulled away he bit his lip hard, wondering how autumn was going to react to him kissing her. he just wanted someone to hold. someone to kiss. someone to love him and tell him he was the most amazing person ever and although he would never going to get that with autumn his drunk mind seemed to be trying it anyway. notes // short and rubbish. ugh! sorry! D=

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN OF CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY IRON & WINE[/center]

[autumn s. blake]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #982D44; border-bottom:30px solid #982D44; border-top:30px solid #982D44; border-right: 30px solid #982D44;] the problem with being heartbroken was that everything you did led up to that person, the one who made everything better and that's what embry did. when she was with him, she felt different. she didn't feel like the person that everyone expected her to be. yeah, she was definitely a people pleaser. she gave them what they expected. she was loud, she was brash, she was over confident, everything. but around him, aus could actually sit down and talk about real things. she remembered the time they talked about the reasons why they shouldn't be together. they talked about it all night starting from easy reasons like opposite houses and going all the way to their own personalities and upbringings. but at the end, he kissed her and told her that he was difficult to get rid of. and that, that was the reason why she had fallen for him so hard. he was just... it was different from what everyone else had, y'know? forgetting about him had taken more than a hundred percent effort and still, it was impossible. that’s what alcohol was for. self destructing, having some fun, forgetting things for one night. that’s the way she wanted to be. she wanted to be the old aus. the one who had tons of fun and joked around a lot. nah, she wasn’t going to be the joy kill in this situation. never. she wasn’t known for that. hell no. aus was the people pleaser. and she give them a show if they demanded for it. she paused and grinned, “of course i’m the nicest!” the alcohol was starting to get to her and even though she knew she would eventually regret this, that wasn’t quite the first thing on her mind. she wasn’t even thinking properly at the moment. all she wanted right now was to hang out with someone who could listen... even if they were a bit drunk right now. that would be great. she leaned back, using her hands for support and although she swayed just the slightest, it was just fine. whatever. it didn’t matter. her and alcohol had a long history behind it. they got along just perfectly, but she had done some pretty stupid things and although she blamed spidey, it wasn’t all his fault. that was different though. this was just... intense. she shook her head, her eyes gazing at the ceiling blankly. “nah... the problem is i don’t want anyone else but him,” she whispered, her voice groggy from the drinks and the yelling she did a few days ago. she didn’t want to lose control like this. she told herself she wouldn’t do this anymore. she told herself she wouldn’t go on a self destructing mode and while she couldn’t help it, this really sucked. it was embry who always kept her sane. it was always him that got her to quit all her fucking bad habits and this sucked to be back at square one. she wanted to get back at him and at the moment, this was the only way she could. her eyes widened just a bit when vaisley leaned in. her mind was screaming at her to get away, but she didn’t. she should have, but she didn’t. his lips touched hers hesitantly and she found herself returning the pressure just a bit. damn, she couldn’t remember kissing anyone else but embry, but it was okay. none of them would remember this in the morning... right? he was the first to back away, leaving her wanting more. that was the way aus got. she was an extremist and she’d do most stuff to get her way. the flask of firewhiskey dropped onto the floor as she leaned in to kiss him once more. notes, AH! INTENSE! word count, 629 thanks brooklyn from caution

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[gabriel]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; background-image: url(http://i583.photobucket.com/albums/ss279/legendskseeker/oceanbreezebg.png); padding-bottom: 20px;] words // 679 // tagged // autumn <3 boy with a coin, T H E N M A K I N G A W I S H , A N D T O S S E D I N T H E S E A how the hell could one girl have reduced gabriel to this. a drunken, emotional mess. it just didn’t make sense. normally he was tough and strong and a bit of an asshole but now he was just a snivelling wreck and this was all because of jasleen. what was it about her that made him do this to himself? they fought like hell and never ever said one nice word to each other yet here gabriel was, thinking that he had some sort of chance with her. he just hoped that secretly she liked him and that she was covering it all up because she was ashamed or something. he just didn’t know. all he knew was that he was desperate for her to like him and that wasn’t happening. that was why he had gone out. to try and forget that she even existed. by getting so drunk that he didn’t even know who he was let alone jasleen. that had kind of back fired though as he found himself sobbing to his worst enemy on the cold hard ground. he just wanted someone to hold him and take him to bed, tuck him in and cuddle him till he fell asleep. and right now he was so drunk that he didn’t care if that person was someone that he normally totally despised and wouldn’t want to be seen dead with her. it wasn’t like anyone would see them and anyone, people would clearly see that gabriel was drunk and therefore he could blame that for why he was with aus. as aus applied just as much pressure as he was in the kiss, gabriel smiled, enjoying the feel of a girls soft lips on his own, shutting his eyes, picturing what this would be like with jasleen. he slightly regretted pulling away but he wanted to make sure that he wasn’t going to be smacked for kissing her. to his surprise though aus leant forward for another kiss and of course gabriel obliged, leaning in to meet her lips, opening his mouth slightly to allow her tongue to enter his mouth as his own explored aus’. his hand found it’s way to the back of her head as he gently pulled her a bit closer, pressing harder on her lips. despite the warmth of aus’ lips he found himself shivering and his bum was starting to go numb on the hard, cold ground so gabriel gently broke the kiss, his eyes opening to look at aus. “I’m sorry to ruin a good kiss but how about we go somewhere a bit warmer?” he suggested, his voice slurring slightly as he surprised himself by actually being able to construct a sentence. he very carefully pulled himself, using the wall to support himself before turning round and holding a hand out to aus for her to use to help to get up. as he pulled her to her feet he pulled her straight into a kiss, his arms wrapping round her waist this time as he bit down gently on her lip. “how about we go warm up in my dorm?” he suggested, not moving more then a few centimetres away from her as his eyes stared directly into hers. it was a risky move and his head was screaming at him that this was wrong and there was no way that he should be doing it but the alcohol pushed that to one side, knowing that aus was as drunk as he was and she was up for fun and heartbroken. nothing could go wrong. they wouldn’t remember this in the morning and anyway they would only do a bit of kissing and cuddling. he smiled softly, taking her hand as he started to walk towards his dorm, glad that they were very close and there within a minute despite the fact that the pair of them were staggering around. he let go of her hand, walking towards his bed before collapsing on it, smiling at her broadly. “care to join me?” he teased, winking at her seductively. notes // i'm so sorry it took so long! i was ill and what not! hope its ok!

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TEMPLATE BY KHRISTIAN OF CAUTION 2.0, LYRICS BY IRON & WINE[/center]

[autumn s. blake]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #982D44; border-bottom:30px solid #982D44; border-top:30px solid #982D44; border-right: 30px solid #982D44;] she wished she could have been different. she wished she could get this longing out of her system. sometimes it was so intense that it made breathing hard. she didn’t know what this feeling was. she had experience it before with other guys, but none of them made her feel this nervous. actually just the night before, she had been so overwhelmed with sort of grief that she had to take a walk. unfortunately aus didn’t like talking about her feelings. she didn’t like making herself feel weak. there was only one person who could make her feel better and obviously he wasn’t here so she had to opt for the next best thing. one of her friends back at home. now she and her friend, jacey, weren’t as close as they could have been. they used to be, just hanging out, but if the two spent more than a day together, she could have been driven out of her mind. i mean, really, it was always about what harry did or what rachel did with thomas who liked delaney who would just never admit it. jacey was one of those girls who talked about boys nonstop, so much that it often drove her crazy. sometimes, it made her want to just jump off a cliff or something. but this time, the girl was actually comforting. she helped console the poor wreck and they talked for over an hour. people ask how girls can talk for so long or why they go into the bathrooms together or some ridiculous question, but there was a perfect answer. it was their way of comforting each other. they went to each other for support and sometimes, the bathroom was the only place they could do it, right? aus wanted to be there with embry. she didn’t even care if she wasn’t talking to him or not, she just wanted to be close, do anything to get nearer. the longing inside of her was eating her alive and she didn’t know what to do. there was a reason why she was here now, with a never ending flask of alcohol and with the one guy she couldn’t stand. there were many people she wanted to murder and well, vaisley happened to be one of them. but apparently not tonight. her heart was too hurt to say anything witty and frankly, her mind was too clouded to think properly. aus felt herself getting closer to him and she couldn’t help but press her body against his, trying to close the space between the two. she couldn’t remember the last time someone kissed her like this... well, she could, but she couldn’t remember the last time it was someone else. she missed him... she... she could feel her blond hair getting slightly more tangled against his hand, but she liked the feeling. she couldn’t help smiling a bit, letting her tongue run a smooth line against his teeth. yeah, funny thing how she was so horrible with love and this such of crap, but damn, she was a good kisser. nothing coincidental about that, right? it was only that he pulled away that she felt just a little bit dazed. she was barely able to respond, simply nod a little. the two stood up, her hands holding his, pulling him closer. she leaned against the wall, letting him kiss her deeply. if she were sane right now, she would have been thinking she was completely crazy. she would have thought she was off her rocker. if she were sane, she probably would have shot herself at this point. still, aus didn’t even listen to herself. she was known for being the impulsive one around the tower. she wasn’t going to let that reputation leave her in just a split second. she didn’t even look around his room- normally she would have been curious to know what was in his room, but her blue eyes never left his. “you talk too much,” her voice hushed as she sat on his bed, taking his hand and putting it on her waist. she smirked, raising an eyebrow, anxious to see how he’d react. ah, virgins were always fun to corrupt, weren’t they. notes, sorry it took so looong! ): word count, 704 thanks brooklyn from caution

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